Thursday 18 August 2011

Through a child's eyes

The week before last  we had a rather tough one with Little man C. On Monday I had to go and fetch him at school in the middle of the day as he was complaining of a tummy ache and they had a rota virus alert at the school. He really looked out of sorts - not himself, but as soon as I dropped him off with Lucy he cheered up and he never was sick or complained the rest of the day.  Tuesday night (and every night going forward) I had a question from him: "What day is it tomorrow?" I'd say Wednesday (or whatever) and then he asked if he goes to school on a Wednesday (or whatever) to which I would reply with a yes. He would then burst into tears and say that his tummy will hurt again and I would explain that it would not as he is not sick. But I have learned long ago that a sore tummy is often about emotional stuff and not real tummy aches - so I said to Hunter that something was up at school. I have to admit that my first thought was bullying.

By the Sunday night he just broke down at bath time and I asked him if someone hurt him to which Little man L replied with a name. C confirmed it an asked that I fetch him after lunch as he gets hurt after lunch. I then mentioned it to the teacher the next day who was rather surprised as the named child is one of his close friends. But promised to handle it which the school does rather well in general. But the tears continued until on Thursday. I had another chat to the teacher who said to me that she has just figured out what the problem was.She let Little man C pick up a DVD and show to me and he told me that this DVD is now going home with one of the kids and will never return to school. A big smile followed. It turned out he was scared to death of.... Charlie and the Chocolate factory! (They watch DVD at school in the cold months or rainy days in the late afternoon from 4 onwards).

So my question is, do we really know what scares kids? I would not have thought that this one would have, but it is the way Johnny Depp looks in the movie that scares him - not the story or a scene. Some of the Disney movies are quite scary too - in particular I found some scenes in The Princess and the Frog very scary.. I know the Princess was so scared of The Lion King when she first saw it (the scene with the stampede). The school has promised that they will now stick to Barney, Noddy and so forth. Safe stuff.

So what scares your kids, or you for that matter? (I remember crying my heart out and being so scared in the fire scene in Bambi as a kid). And how do you handle this issue with kids? I for one like to watch a movie or DVD with my kids for the first time so that I can handle any issues if needed.

14 comments:

  1. They say parenting is not for sissies - and we can see why, hey?
    I remember one of my girls being terrified of a character in their school play
    So glad you found out so quickly what the problem was - hats off to the teacher for being so observant. 

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  2. @45fe45a680845cd8d1fc62294bca8fbf I guess that's one of the plusses to a small school

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  3. Oh bless him! My oldest son had nightmares for weeks after watching Toy story 2! (he was 6 at the time!) The furnace scene - when all the toys were going to get burnt... scared the crackers out of him :(
    As for me... I can remember watching the 007 movie "moonraker" when I was very young... and I was petrified of Jaws for years! I remember him biting through the cable cars with his teeth! I didn't want to go in a cablcar for years after that 

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  4. I agree some of these movies can be very scary for a kid.  To be honest, I thought several of the Christmas cartoons with the Snowman and the claymation people were scary when I was a kid.  I still thing they're creepy to this day.  My daughter on the other hand loves Scooby Doo which baffles me because I would think some of those episodes would be scary for her.  I've found when she's scarred during a show she starts getting up and walks away as her coping mechanism.  That's when I make a mental note and we turn it off and dont watch it again for awhile.  Great post and topic.  I hope Little Man C recovers quickly.

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  5. Gem is scared of Bambi and Alice in wonderland. For now, i stick with Dora and Peppa Pig and try not to let her watch anything too old. I also keep an eye on her if she is watching something different and she always says, she doesnt want to watch something if it scares her. Good on you and teacher for figuring it out:-)

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  6. Johnny Depp is a little creepy looking in that movie.  Poor little guy.

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  7. Poor guy! Luckily you figured it out!
    My toddler gets afraid of a Pooh story, and she never wants to read that specific book...

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  8. Yes, Johnny Depp looks rather freaky in that movie.  I find the older Willy Wonka one is far less freaky and scary.  My oldest (Bianca) doesn't get scared of most movies.  She's into the whole Harry Potter one and has seen up to number 6 so far.  We did find once that there was a movie called Spirited Away which is a beautifully animated story that we started watching one evening and there was one bit where the girl's parents were turned into pigs.  Because it was late we switched it off and that night she felt scared.  I continued watching and then the next day insisted she watches the rest so she can see that it ends happy.  They say (often with young kids) you should never leave a movie / story in the middle.  You should finish it so that they can see how it will be resolved and that more often than not it ends happy. 

    There are quite a few things Cailtyn doesn't enjoy watching so when we have movie nights at home we either let Caitlyn watch in the lounge and Bianca in her room on the laptop or we first watch something Caitlyn wants to watch and then after she's gone to bed something Bianca enjoys watching.

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  9. Yup, allie mentioned the school play? That was me! I was terrified of the witch (Die Heks van Toeberaka) is my sisters school play - I didnt sleep for weeks and can still remember it like yesterday (it was 35yrs ago!!) My kids have all been afraid of various (what I thought innocuous) disney movie scenes. I am SO pleased you found out - it awful to have a scared kid.

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  10. Shame man :( At least you figured it out.

    Not much scares Cameron any more but Kiara still finds certain movies a little too much for her - generally ones with heavy emotions in like death or intense fear!

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  11. Poor little guy. Amazing what scares them hey? My Tween boy is quite scared of certain movies. My Toddler was scared of the beach for a very long time. Think it was the bigness of it and the sound of the waves. He has only now started being OK with it.

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  12. You know what? I also found that some Disney movies scare my 4 year old daughter and even some shows on children channels. She will usually come tell us what scare her and then we will turn it off and now show that movie or show to her again. I've realised that it is because she can't totally grasp what is happening in that particular moment of the movie or show and that scares her. 
    I'm glad you figured out what scares your little man. You are a good parent.

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  13. Oh shame poor poppet. I guess I am lucky in that my kids have pretty much never been scared of movies, and it have never carried over into night terrors, dreams or general fears. I am not sure how/why but my 2 can easily separate something as 'only a movie/story' and reality. I imagine it must be very scary and difficult to manage for those that do get genuinely scared by stuff they see and hear. I hope he feels better now!?

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  14. I remember watching Bambi with B...and she cried from the moment Bambi's mom was killed until the end of the movie.  You never know what will scare the little ones.  Leane is currently obsessed about death...and she is only 4.

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