The ambiguity of being 6

Mostly she is mommy's big girl, my helper and the one I can rely on to be more flexible in most situations. On Saturday she joined me for my Zumba class - the instructor announced a few weeks ago that on Saturday mornings girls over 5 are welcome to join.  They were 3 - the one 5 and the other I would guess about 9 or 10. And they had fun.And she did most of the workout not sitting out one moment- the challenge was mainly moving between the flowingness of ballet to the rhythm of the Latin steps. She does her school work with confidence, she plays her Netball and is apparently quite the goal shooter and is getting more and more independent - this morning she helped C to pour his second bowl of breakfast. She opened her book pack for grade 1 this morning (we were at the info evening last night - lots of emotions) and oohed and ahhed over every pencil and bag - excited for all it will hold.On Saturday night she and Hunter watched the whole of Lion King - until very late and although she was sad to see Mufasa die, she was not scared. She danced her first ballet exam with huge confidence. She is taking more and more responsibility for her siblings  In fact, sometimes one has to stop her from being a "little mommy" and taking too much on herself. After all she is not the adult. She is only 6.

Which I clearly saw yesterday too. When I told her the morning that we were going to the grade 1 evening the night and Lucy will be looking after them she cried. And cried. And cried some more. None of the boys were upset at all. Picking her up after school she cried again. And refused to tell me about her day. Apparently mommy is not allowed to go anywhere - daddy is ok -he can go, but mommy not. Mommy goes to bookclub too many times (it's once a month) and to girls craft night too much (once a month too - been there only twice) and out with daddy too much (we are lucky if it's once a month). So someone told me that we spoiled her by not going out and away enough. Really, I do not think it is spoiling your child by being with them - rather, maybe just a case of not used to us being away. Something she has to get used to. When I left last night it was a shower of tears again. And anger.

I will chalk it up to the ambiguity of being 6 - being on the threshold of going to big school - that first step of really growing up. But still wanting to feel sheltered and be mommy and daddy's little Princess.

It's really tough to grow up - but we are enjoying the ride, be it with tear filled eyes.