About 4 weeks ago Mr C undressed after Judo and when he wanted to pack his judogi pants they were nowhere to be found. The boys that were still in the dressing room checked their bags but whoever took it already left. The sensei asked in the next two classes that all the boys check their suits but no one came forward. I have this morning emailed all the moms I know of to have a look. My point is surely you would notice when you unpack a bag? I know I would notice and extra pair of white pants in my boys' cupboard. We have looked at the lost property box plenty of times. My question is, is there a mom that just does not care enough to even check?
We have a Whatsapp group for the 0/9 rugby - with the rules "only to be used for important information". Our school has a great arrangement where no one buys rugby jerseys - the school has a full stock for teams. So the boys go to a tournament with their ordinary sport shirts which gets swapped next to the field for the school jersey and swapped back after. On Tuesday after their first friendly match this season 3 boys could not find their shirts - 2 had unidentified shirts but not their own and one left totally without a shirt. So as good moms all 3 on the group asked if someone had their sons' shirt. There was about 6 messages with moms sorting out among each other when a dad messaged " Lets keep this group to the rules and only share important information". So I ask you - is it not important to have your clothes back? Are we so spoiled that we assume that one would just buy another one? Quickly a rugby moms group was formed where the admin said: " You can take yourself off if you do not think it is important but we will use this forum to retrieve lost shirts." I applaud her!
About 3 weeks ago L's kicking board was not at the end of the pool where he left it after his lesson. We have 2 that we share as a family as we are never more than 2 at a time in the pool. The next group was already busy in the water with their boards. So the au pair asked the coaches to check and our board was clearly not in the water . The next lesson we all checked the store room where the lost property is and it was not there. For 3 weeks. In the end I bought another board as we could honestly not continue borrowing a board. Last Friday the pool was quiet and C was asked to join another group in an earlier lesson. Lo and behold - a girl in the group had our board. Very clearly in big black letters marked with our surname. So C immediately told her that it was our board. When they got our of the pool she handed him the board and he took it to my MIL who was at the pool with them. Next thing the mom stormed my MIL demanding why C took "her daughter's" kick board. My MIL showed her our surname and C said we have been looking for it for weeks. Do yo know what this mom did? No apology - threw her hand in the air! She turned around, marched to the lost property (after C asked if they have checked it for their board), retrieved another board (maybe it was theirs , who knows) and triumphantly lifted it in the air, making sure my family saw it.
The question really is - how are we raising our kids? Are we raising a generation that will just loose something and not care about it? Are we raising a generation so focused on disposable that clothes become disposable? Are teaching them that it is ok to take someone else's things if yours are gone? Are we being that irresponsible?
Yes, I know it takes time and effort you may not have. It's not pleasant to have another thing to reprimand the kids on. It's tedious to check jackets, lunch boxes and water bottles every day. But we will continue to do it because I fear their generation may be so spoiled that most are not raised to take responsibility. To blatantly take what is not theirs.
Your thoughts my friends....
I cannot believe it...on the other hand I see thia daily in my office environment too. They have gottwn to know me that if they take my stuff, I will demand it back. Some parents are creating little criminals to fit in with SA :( It feela like criminals get away with everything.
ReplyDeleteTrue, Natasha. They tease me at work but I label all my stuff that's why it doesn't go missing because I have BIG, hot pink stickers :) I can spot my stuff a mile away! Before the hot pink stickers, things would disappear as other people's things do.
DeleteI am shocked!! Did this mom not see your surname on the board? wow... what kind of generation are we raising if that is the example that is being set? I agree with you that we need to teach our children that being careless with your property is not acceptable. I am going to sound like an old lady now but money does not grow on trees and if you are going to be careless with your belongings I will not be replacing them. We have had incidents where someone took something of their's by mistake but that is something completely different. X
ReplyDeleteYes the little ones can make mistakes - but then surely you see it and rectify the issue?
DeleteYes of course!! I am shaking my head in shock...
DeleteI wouldn't have believed this until we ourselves got to big school. A friend of ours lost their blazer, it was marked. He knows exactly where he left it. The next day it was gone. It did not turn up in lost and found. This means someone STOLE that blazer? Who does things like that. Who lets their child wear a stolen item to school? Liam lost a pair of goggles at the pool, they haven't turned up in lost and found either.. I told him to scour every child's face at swimming because someone picked them up and someone is USING them! On the other side of the coin, I must say I am impressed that he has been so responsible with his stuff. So far, we have only lost a pair of goggles this term :) When I went to look for the goggles in lost and found, I was gobsmacked at the amount of stuff that is unclaimed. Expensive stuff at that! Between families who just take stuff that doesn't belong to them and families who just don't bother to claim their missing stuff, I am totally shocked!
ReplyDeleteExactly Robs!
DeleteWe have the same problem. Also a large lost-and-found box at school. Little Miss's brand-new character shoes disappeared, and I also do not want to go and buy new ones! She must also learn to take responsibility.
ReplyDeleteThis afternoon I will have to go and search for a pencil case in the lost-and-found that did not come back on Monday... "sigh"
Oh gosh no, character shoes are expensive! Surely there can not be too many ballerinas there?
DeleteI'm with you...I cannot imagine not checking my kiddos' things...and not realizing if they had something that didn't belong to us!
ReplyDeleteAnd you raise a very good question about what these situations say, both about how we treat our property, and how we help and respect others.
That's CRAZY about the kickboard!!! I would have been appalled if we'd been using another family's property!!! Yikes!!!
Oh my goodness. The gal of that family, just taking someone else's things. I am astounded. And am so going to be pedantic about marking all of K's things clearly.
ReplyDeleteWe've had a missing pink swimming towel. But Kendra knew exactly who could have had it - the girl also had a hot pink towel. But then it gets interesting because she asked the girl a number of times and the girl said it's hers, so I mailed the teacher and said could I either have the girl's mother's email or could she contact the mother. The towel was returned two days later. Boom!
ReplyDeleteI can't STAND thievery. In fact, any dishonesty. Yes, the stuff is expensive but don't steal. I've given the kids the talk so many times Kendra now says, "yes, we know. WATCH your stuff and put it away immediately" :)
I'm appalled at that mom with the swimming board. So blatant!
I check and I've trained Nanny S to check everything in detail every single day because I whatsapp (last year) and email the teacher straight away. We've only had the towel incident this term, and the teacher emailed because one day Connor left his tracksuit top.... but EVERYTHING is labelled. Even the lids of their whiteboard markers!
I think you were saved by a good label. This is why labeling is so important.
ReplyDeleteI do agree with you, people don't bother to check things. So we just have to keep working on having a sense of value of stuff and not just a sense of things being disposable.
We label EVERYTHING! And yes, we have to keep working on it
DeleteSo far Nicola has lost 3 lunch boxes and two purses. Erin has lost 10 000 hair clips and one school shoe. They both get stern talkings to about looking after their things and usually end up either getting their lunch in a paper bag for a week or wearing tekkies to school for a week until they find their things or we replace it.
ReplyDeleteSheesh, I would have given that thief a piece of my mind and then some! The nerve!
I actually wish I was there to do exactly that.
DeleteIt is about paying attention. If your child rocks up at home with something that you know is not theirs, you should immediately ask where they got it from. I have had some of Zoe's stuff appear quite quickly when I ask outright if it is at somebody's house. What I find mind boggling is that the parents don't ask how it got there in the first place. It is an "inattention" to detail that lead to that - too busy with social media, games, work, fighting etc and not paying attention to the kids and the here and now.
ReplyDeleteI've spent years tracking down lost items of clothing and attempting to return 'found' pieces in my boys bags, as a result I've rummaged through many a lost property bin and I'm amazed at how a parent can not realise their child has lost an item, especially when it's a pair of school shoes lying their unclaimed
ReplyDeleteUgh. I have lost count of the number of times we have had brand new items of clothing simply go missing after PE class or a sports activity. It drives me crazy!
ReplyDeleteOMG, don't get me started on this. Liam came home with 2 cars, not his, from aftercare. He couldn't remember whose they were so I made him put them in the lost and found box. There were bottles, jackets, school shoes, you name it, clearly marked. Like you said, don't you as a mum know what was in the bag and what should come back.
ReplyDeleteAs for that mum with the kick board. What an effin cheek (sorry) How does she go around with her head held high. Pffft
I remember Deblet telling me last year to mark Liams stuff with tippex or black khoki because you would be surprised at the amount of parents who will unpick a name label or tear it off
Oh this annoys me to no end! I thought I was the only mom who will make sure an item that does not belong to us is returned to school asap because these things are bloody expensive! Especially when you have more than one kid! We always need to be mindful that our children are learning these values from us! I'm glad you highlighted this and hopefully it will change another parent's mindset!
ReplyDeleteIts just terrible . Sorry you have to deal with this. But unfortunately you get some low class ppl in this world who wouldn't bat an eyelid for claiming goods as their own,despite it being clearly labelled as someone else's. They're just in this life for themselves.
ReplyDeleteSad but true. A-holes walk amongst us.And will unfortunately raise their kids under the same philosophy.
It urks me that this is what I will also have to go through with my kids' possessions too one day.
But here's to the rest of us,who will keep instilling proper ethics and values in our children.