Wednesday, 26 October 2011

The ambiguity of being 6

Mostly she is mommy's big girl, my helper and the one I can rely on to be more flexible in most situations. On Saturday she joined me for my Zumba class - the instructor announced a few weeks ago that on Saturday mornings girls over 5 are welcome to join.  They were 3 - the one 5 and the other I would guess about 9 or 10. And they had fun.And she did most of the workout not sitting out one moment- the challenge was mainly moving between the flowingness of ballet to the rhythm of the Latin steps. She does her school work with confidence, she plays her Netball and is apparently quite the goal shooter and is getting more and more independent - this morning she helped C to pour his second bowl of breakfast. She opened her book pack for grade 1 this morning (we were at the info evening last night - lots of emotions) and oohed and ahhed over every pencil and bag - excited for all it will hold.On Saturday night she and Hunter watched the whole of Lion King - until very late and although she was sad to see Mufasa die, she was not scared. She danced her first ballet exam with huge confidence. She is taking more and more responsibility for her siblings  In fact, sometimes one has to stop her from being a "little mommy" and taking too much on herself. After all she is not the adult. She is only 6.

Which I clearly saw yesterday too. When I told her the morning that we were going to the grade 1 evening the night and Lucy will be looking after them she cried. And cried. And cried some more. None of the boys were upset at all. Picking her up after school she cried again. And refused to tell me about her day. Apparently mommy is not allowed to go anywhere - daddy is ok -he can go, but mommy not. Mommy goes to bookclub too many times (it's once a month) and to girls craft night too much (once a month too - been there only twice) and out with daddy too much (we are lucky if it's once a month). So someone told me that we spoiled her by not going out and away enough. Really, I do not think it is spoiling your child by being with them - rather, maybe just a case of not used to us being away. Something she has to get used to. When I left last night it was a shower of tears again. And anger.

I will chalk it up to the ambiguity of being 6 - being on the threshold of going to big school - that first step of really growing up. But still wanting to feel sheltered and be mommy and daddy's little Princess.

It's really tough to grow up - but we are enjoying the ride, be it with tear filled eyes.


  1. It’s nice to be needed but it’s also so important to have some “you” time. Your little girl is gorgeous!

  2. Aaaawwww, I love the tears - at least you feel LOVED!!!!

    (i know I'm a bit weird)

    She sounds so lovely - I can't wait to get to know her some more.

    But K did the same this morning with D going to work (a new thing) - waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Daddy gone to work.

    Eventually I said to Connor, let's go talk in the bedroom and after about 10 mins total crying by the little one, she joined us because she wanted a tissue (her other love!)

  3. PS definitely not spoiling to be with them. Also a colleague put it in perspective for me.

    there's going to come a time when they DON'T want to be with us and that's going to be terrible, at least for me.

  4. I dont think it is spoiling them at all. I love spending time with Little OL. I do however go out every Thursday night - I have art classes that I resumed when she was 1, but she screams when I leave. We have found the easiest is for me to go straight there after work. I think as she gets older even that will pose a problem. In our case it is also fine for daddy to come and go as he pleases.

  5. Love their personalities! Gemma does that to me sometimes but then other times, she says; mom, why arent you going to work tonight?You must go to work. ( I think she prefers having dad put her to bed at night as he phaffs more;-)
    the joys of growing up!

  6. Oh shame! So sweet! It shows you how much they still need you in their lives, although she is 6...
    I sometimes think my Teen wants to be more on her own, and then she surprises us by choosing to stay with us rather than doing her own thing!

  7. Bittersweet post. Being 6 seems so big but it is actually still very little...

  8. I agree with you. It is the fact they really are still just little, but also growing up and dealing with new emotions, new ideas and a great big world out there.

  9. @Marcia - now that's true - some day they might not want to be with us.

    Oh I miss Disqus!

  10. Aaah sweet pea! I make the mistake the other way- because she is the youngest I always think she's still little. Last night I realised how much she has grown this year.

  11. You will be sad when she accepts your going easily. It is just another faze and she wants to do everything with you. When they get to their teenage years they don't want to even know you, see you or go anywhere with you. You have such a sweet little thing there...enjoy her.

  12. I can totally relate to this. My Sarah is only 4 but sounds like just A - she's such a 'mother' to her brothers (even though one is her twin) but she's so sweet and nurturing to her younger brother. She works hard and wants to be such a big girl...but she's so attached to me - often fusses and cries if I have to go somewhere and always "I'll miss you!"

    So tough to hear but in the long run, good for us both to have some time...

  13. Ah, the joys of being loved!! ;P

    Doesn't sound like you get too much me time...enjoy guilt!!


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