Thursday, 18 April 2013

The way we see ourselves

We as woman often see ourselves in such a negative light - we would dwell on the bits we do not like, try to better them. Think of the fat around our tummies before we see the good calves we have. Dwell upon not full enough or too full lips forgetting our striking eyes. The list goes on.

Even the Princess at 8 is starting to get critical about herself - I often hear that she thinks she is too tall (and too thin) - when grade 1's think she is a grade 4 and ask advice. When her friends remark that she is so very tall. She once told me that she was never a cute grade 1 because she was too tall. Believe me, we try to focus on the positive of being tall. And although she is often told she is pretty by others she certainly does not think she is. But there's a fine line between being humble (like we want our children to be) and not seeing our own prettiness. Believing ourselves to be less attractive than we are. I guess it is a balance to teach our kids, and especially our girls as certainly the beauty label does not fall so heavy on our boys, that you are pretty and awesome in your own right without spurring on vanity.

I think this also goes down on us as mothers and how we see ourselves. A negative self image can not possibly create a positive one for our daughters. So let's rejoice in our frizzy hair, too big chins, too narrow lips and too round faces. In our flabby thighs and too narrow shoulders. Let's see ourselves positive. Let's break the negative cycle.Because hec, living up to Barbie is still not possible Let's face it generations of woman have failed - let's help this one to know they do not need to measure up to the impossible. That there is beauty in all of us - we just need to see it.

And please have a look at this - it may just inspire you to see yourself in a different light.
You are beautiful, you may just not see it as others do.


  1. Thanks for dropping me a line. I managed to delete it somehow! I have a tablet and no idea what I'm doing....

  2. Ah, what a great post. So very true. Why do we always focus on the negative when the positive is RIGHT in front of our eyes?


  3. Very true. I just borrowed your post and blogged about it... hope you don't mind

  4. Its so true that we often only focus on what we perceive to be negatives.

  5. I always try to tell my daughters how beautiful they are, and to focus on what is important. We have an opposite problem here at our house. Being too short always made me feel less, because people always thought I was much younger than I was. Now the youngest is also a shorty... :D At least I know how it feels!

  6. So true, we do focus on the negative! I have been asking family members since the age of your daughter.. "does my bum look fat in this?"!! :-)
    Wish the men in my life were a bit kinder about my size but they can't resist winding me up!

  7. Love this post. After my miscarriage I've been quite down on myself and my body - this has helped me re-focus on the stuff that is good about myself and my body. Thank you.


    1. Oh your comment makes me so totally happy

  8. I just saw the parody that someone made of the Dove ad. About men-how they think they are more handsome than they really are.I saw it on facebook and it is also on Youtube.
    Loved this post. We really struggle to see ourselves in an objective way.

  9. You are so right. I went out with my mom's group the other night, after a little while we were all sitting around the table talking about what we didn't like about our appearance and what plastic surgery we'd like (a boob job for me please!). It's sad really...

  10. what a great post!

    It's so true - our bodies are healthy and (mostly) functioning and that's number 1 - the rest is just a cherry on the top.

  11. I liked this post. It is just sad that many people base their self worth on how they look and usually on the basis of what is in magazines without realising that there 's been a lot of photoshopping to get the people to look like they are really perfect

  12. Love you and am so thankful you shared on this same topic. I pray she one day loves her height and even uses it to her advantage somehow. My sister in law is very tall and she has embraced it. I'll be praying for us and our girls in this journey.


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